37

i think it's about time i named this blog something, kinda like the kittie from the diary of Anne Frank. i'll think about the name later cause right now there seems to be a lot on my mind. my fear is that my brain is hypoxic due to 37 continuos waking up and that my altered circadian cycle could possibly have affected my cognitive ability or maybe accentuate it more. suddenly i feel like i'm able to think of numerous issues that pertain to daily aspects of my life, what i'm doing right, what i'm doing wrong and also made me more cognizantly cognizant of my spatial/temporal relationship with other pple. however at the same time  also i feel like a chicken half alive but almost dead kinda thing..ok nw i'm gibberishing! shit!   ok whatever, so actually i had hospital posting at night and went around looking at patients and the newly warded cases and so yeah, there were some good ones, some rejected ones and some impossible ones and not to forget some dead ones( died due to failure of intubation and resusitation man!). it was cool, i've never actually seen a hospital suite but hell yeah it's damn happening, but nah, the idea of being in a hospital is such a turnoff.... freak!i realised something during my rounds that doctors sometimes just whack their judgement and yes their true limitations will surface in times of emergencies and that that makes you thinking of whether u are prepared for the worse possible cases the medical world has got to offer and what will be ur response to such a situation..that's exactly my fear...i don't mind being challenged but testing my limits( aprreciate the difference) is a totally different thing....depending on the circumstances, my state of mind and emotional state at that mment.....there can be two-fold response.... u either make it or break it. one day, i'll bring myself to that test but now......i'll keep myself prepared!   on a totaly different note, everyone says i'm busy and that i also tell them i am busy and that neither one nor the other can go out and therefore it's been a long time since i've met up with my other frens cause i'm so committed to this dance thingy that aiyah...don't know lah...i like it so much! can't help i guess... ...but do keep myself updated though everyone is doing fine( duh! ) not that i expect them to be in hospital ya know but yeah..they're good. i'll have to make an effort to meet up wit them... ok dudes if u're reading this how bout ChaiChee? leapk with tea and fried rice sambal....slurp..dammit..feel like eating it now...   ok i shall not drag some more..i'm getting bored of the routine i'm having daily. and yes, i want to get a motorbike soon, i was thinking of an X9 but obviously i received violent objections from my biker frens who thought that maybe i'd be better off with a Wave and some say i look like a Racer-Mat...and some added i can maneuvre the bike "skillfully" hahaha..... so if anyone has any suggestions on a good bike to get...tell me..i think...i'm open for considerations!   p.s. i think i'm getting pestky by the minute..cos i don't know why, i think i'm pissing everyone in more ways than one and that i'm freaking everyone out with i also don't know what...sheesh!! and some even think i'm gay!!  that's a sad testimonial man!! feels like i dont have frens who don't me well enuf to understand me..... well enough whining...i've gt a report to write about....shit!