again?

have u ever felt so desolated?
like ever?

like to the point where nor loneliness nor anger can aptly describe the isolation u feel?

and that things that matter don't matter anymore?
where bonds that bind in a moment sublimate into the vast vacuum, that same vacuum that occupies your soul?

where emotions seeps into the capillaries of your brain but somehow, truncation overrides manifestation?

where u envisage what that moment of nothingness, when extended into eons of tranquility of mind and space,with the limitless opportunity to remain at one with body and spirit,would be like?

where your presence doesn't matter at all?

and u wished science's principle of nuclear vaporization were applied? or that somehow you'll melt under the heat of insignificance that overshadowed u?

and somehow...at that time, u wished u had someone other than your miserable self to blame for the awkwardness that's causing u misery?

and that u wished u were better off pathologically-impaired or psychologically-troubled or insane or suffering the withdrawal effects of attention-deficit-syndrome?

i wish for so many things when i feel left out, desolated, islanded, abandoned or _____________(fill in the blanks). but i thank God eventually for the patience and imaan he's endowed me with.. and the cognitive ability to get myself out of the situation regardless!!

sadly, ive been there.....and wondering when i will be there again???