Dilemma of a Muslim Modernist.
people strive to be good, in many ways, i their own terms. well i want to be good too, in fact i strive to be best in what i do. but @ times how i get to that point may not be a result or a reflection of the means of getting there, the way that i want it. lost? i think i am too. basically i'm trying to say that, at least for my case in point, that the way i lead my life, in many aspects of it, may not mirror my muslim-identity but more that of a modern-day living entity. see the problem i see with being a 'muslim modernist' is, really, to reconcile the 2 'possibly antagonistic' ( some might disagree ) terms. not that it is impossible, i mean i've thought of many ways and instances of living up to that identity, but it'll need lots of personal development upgrading! like you have to equip yourself with knowledge of religion, in addition to the aspects of secularist, ok modern..., life...
however the reality for some of us is that we find one of the two particularly influential... to point where it becomes a way of living. and that way of living for so many is so ingrained that when it comes to letting go some of the 'more important' aspects of it, they become fearful and the lumrah(as the malays would say meaning nature) of man is to exact a compensatory reaction, with exceptions. few examples would be the rise of Sufism possibly a rxn due to the politicisation of Islam, the rise of fundamentalism and neofundamentalism after the so called "imprisonment of ijtihad" and we see the neo-revivalist movements of Khomeini, Muslim brotherhood and nation of islam and the list goes on ( however not exclusive to islam alone).
as mentioned, it's hard to let go what more change. it's hard to convince people that their ideology is wrong and that yours is correct. the only way is for pple to be convinced themselves when they see, hear,do and experience! so maybe i'm not there yet. and yeah maybe i think it's hard to change or maybe i don't want to change cause i love what i've been doing all along or maybe... i'm not guided, have not seen the true light at the end of the 'tunnel', what have nots. i want to know more, but i've no time and no means. maybe the reason why my muslim-modernist self isn't showing is cos i don't know enough to know what 'right' things i should be doing, or even if i do, how am i suppose to apply them to this extremely powerful force we call modernity. i don't know..i'll have to wait and see. in the mean time i shan't be a prisoner of my so called personal ideologies and be more receptive of what others have to say with regards to this 'identity crisis' of mine and hopefully through that i hope to be able to rethink,reconsider, re-evaluate, relinquish and reconcile (what do ya know the 5Rs!!) my stand!
people strive to be good, in many ways, i their own terms. well i want to be good too, in fact i strive to be best in what i do. but @ times how i get to that point may not be a result or a reflection of the means of getting there, the way that i want it. lost? i think i am too. basically i'm trying to say that, at least for my case in point, that the way i lead my life, in many aspects of it, may not mirror my muslim-identity but more that of a modern-day living entity. see the problem i see with being a 'muslim modernist' is, really, to reconcile the 2 'possibly antagonistic' ( some might disagree ) terms. not that it is impossible, i mean i've thought of many ways and instances of living up to that identity, but it'll need lots of personal development upgrading! like you have to equip yourself with knowledge of religion, in addition to the aspects of secularist, ok modern..., life...
however the reality for some of us is that we find one of the two particularly influential... to point where it becomes a way of living. and that way of living for so many is so ingrained that when it comes to letting go some of the 'more important' aspects of it, they become fearful and the lumrah(as the malays would say meaning nature) of man is to exact a compensatory reaction, with exceptions. few examples would be the rise of Sufism possibly a rxn due to the politicisation of Islam, the rise of fundamentalism and neofundamentalism after the so called "imprisonment of ijtihad" and we see the neo-revivalist movements of Khomeini, Muslim brotherhood and nation of islam and the list goes on ( however not exclusive to islam alone).
as mentioned, it's hard to let go what more change. it's hard to convince people that their ideology is wrong and that yours is correct. the only way is for pple to be convinced themselves when they see, hear,do and experience! so maybe i'm not there yet. and yeah maybe i think it's hard to change or maybe i don't want to change cause i love what i've been doing all along or maybe... i'm not guided, have not seen the true light at the end of the 'tunnel', what have nots. i want to know more, but i've no time and no means. maybe the reason why my muslim-modernist self isn't showing is cos i don't know enough to know what 'right' things i should be doing, or even if i do, how am i suppose to apply them to this extremely powerful force we call modernity. i don't know..i'll have to wait and see. in the mean time i shan't be a prisoner of my so called personal ideologies and be more receptive of what others have to say with regards to this 'identity crisis' of mine and hopefully through that i hope to be able to rethink,reconsider, re-evaluate, relinquish and reconcile (what do ya know the 5Rs!!) my stand!
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