i jsut finished watching two episodes of grey's anatomy and well, though it was a bit exaggerting, i guess i did inspire me, abit to do what i am supposed to do as an intern(house officer for the British trained). like tons of administration, doing plug setting and blood taking and cultures and ordering medications you don't even know for what. u just take the medication chart and just write down everything the consultant says. never mind what the heck the drug is for. but hey, u have be a doctor to prescribe it and what better way to abuse an intern, who by the way is a doctor and can write and has like tons of other mindless jobs to do. like follow a patient down to the radiology department 1km away, wait for him or her to take a CT scan and walk 1km back. i'm not complaining, people's lives are at risk here and someone's gotta do it. so here we are doing it. it's just a preview of what i am going to be doing. although i do not know what i am supposed to be doing. after 2 weeks of internship, i am still clueless. never mind that finals are coming in like 4 or 5 months time, someone's gotta do the shit work. and there is just no point giving anyone senior ur i'm-sick-of-this-shit face cause there're just going to give u back their i've-been-there-done-that-look-and-u're-hopeless face. so i just swallow..i'm going to be in that shit hole for the next 1 week and i'm taking a day off. just to say that i have an appointment and i will make an appointment! whatever. maybe it'll be a shopping appointment. and the week after, i'm just praying that i transfer to a ward where the patient turn over is slower and u r not expected to know patient's like ur freaking underwear. on the other hand, it does give u a sense of being resonsible to ur patients and what their problems are.if u manage to stay with them after rounds and all tat, and if u have time-really- u'll find out a lot of things about people and u meet different kinds of people. arrogant poodles, shy mice, mad hatters and whiny chihuahuas u know wat i mean.
i'm struggling to study and work at the same time. and it doesn't help tha tutors are breathing down ur necks and are expecting u to grow exponentially without having giving u the chance to experience it. i mean yes, in reality there's no such thing. and i know that. sometimes i wish i was a ice kacang seller or something.....and speaking of which i am craving for a cup of chendol.

p.s: u hate being a doctor and u wish u hadn't learn medicine when u make mistakes, mistakes that u noe shouldn't have been done in the first place cause u know u can avoid it but u just forgot about it.....and it makes u wonder why the heck do know so much but can do so little sometimes.....